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“Aquamarine” is yet another film where a stunningly astonishing jaw drop event occurs, and is ironically wrapped in a sitcom plot. In this case, a mermaid comes to a Florida beach resort, befriends 2 thirteen-year-old girls, and has a romance with a handsome lifeguard. Ah, and of course there is a blonde b*tch with her entourage to make life miserable to everyone.
Still, I just … the movie is sickly sweet. The young actresses playing twelve-year-olds actually look the age, which hardly ever happens, and have a pleasant unpolished appeal. I am so certain that there are people for the movie just like I know that I am definitely not that audience. It is cute how the two protagonists have a crush on the lifeguard and they use the mermaid as a designated hitter; they tell her how to get the boy’s attention and they just sit back and enjoy as she completely mesmerizes the boy they can only wish for.
The girls are Claire and Hailey, played by Emma Roberts and JoJo (a.k.a. Joanna Levesque). They are best friends, but like all friendships, come an end. Hailey’s mother is moving to Australia in a few days. Like every teenage girs, they crush on a guy called Raymond, played by Jake McDorman. He’s a handsome guy with blond hair, muscles, and is genuinely very nice. They even study the way he shakes his head and stretches to see how he flexes his biceps.
Once, there was a huge storm. The next day, Claire, who happens to be scared of water, accidentally falls into a swimming pool and sees the mermaid that had washed up during the storm. The girls quickly befriend the mermaid, Aquamarine (voiced by Sara Paxton), who not only has a father that creates tsunamis, but has also swum around the entire world. She might be a mermaid, but she acts like a normal human girl. Her rules state that she can swim ‘as much as she wants’, but merpeople can only speak human languages when on land, and transform into a tail when submerged in water, or night comes. “We’re not fictional,” Aquamarine tells the girls. “We’re discreet.” Her nail polish shows her mood by changing colors.
Her task on land is to validate that love is real. This is because her father proposed a marriage to her which he has set up with a possible suitor that she doesn’t love. Three days are all she has to prove to her father that love exists. Claire and Hailey teach her how to catch a boy’s attention. First, hang up the phone after calling him. Step two involves strutting past him in a way that makes it seem like you’ve never seen him. Aquamarine and Raymond soon become ‘an item‘, much to the annoyance of desperate schemer, Cecilia. She starts stalking Aquamarine looking for the secret she is sure will reveal it all, but everything goes wrong and the poor mermaid ends up spending the night locked inside the large fish tank that is positioned just outside town.
So you get the idea. While all this is going on, a feud develops between Cecilia and Aquamarine each determined to emerge as Raymond’s escort for the Final Splash, a spectacular street party for the summer ending. At the same time, mermaids enable Hailey to change a wish into reality and suddenly she has the power to choose whether to make her mother remain in Florida and erase Australia from her memory or not. Uh huh, just like that.
A film of this nature does not make one think, but provide pleasant visuals to watch. It features cheerful youths on screen looking as if they still enjoy making movies. It is so far removed from concrete sexual material that the PG rating, “for some coarse language and suggestive dialogue,” seems too harsh. The emotions are evident as well as the reasoning for the plot being the side, and the mermaid makes me think of my friend McHugh telling me why lobsters are wonderful pets: They don’t bark, and they know the secrets of the deep.
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