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According to British author Douglas Adams, fiction is a tool to understand the lowliness of British culture. He perceived the universe as a classroom with kids playing and using a petty bureaucracy to run a similar place to Earth. Personally, I have never been a fan of comics and novels of this sort, as Adams is known to be very wordy about his ‘nerdy’ interests. In my opinion, Adams has some amazing work, as he tells tales of a ordinary British citizen along with his extraordinarily odd friends and how they travel across the universe to find out, life, the universe and everything. In his literature, he speaks nonsense about semi-mathematical and douphins that have been controlling this planet for centuries. Masquerading as intricate wordsmiths, vanishing puns, and bizarre characters, like Zaphod Beeblebrox and Slartibartfast, are the signature traits of Adams. And while it is understandable that some people may not enjoy these things, it is evident his words were meant to bring joy to the world.
Even his most loyals fans will have a tough time with this long anticipated film adaptation of A Hitchhiker’s Guide to Galaxy. The film opens up with the dolphins mentioned above, passionately singing “So long and thanks for all the fish!” as they swim in a moon lit sky. Ford Prefect (Mos Def) saves Arthur Dent (Martin Freeman) right before Earth is demolised to build a hyperspace express lane. Arthur Dent is the ‘slacker hero’ of the famous TV show The Office. Unlike the darker The War of the Worlds, there is no drama over the corpses. It seems like Ford and Arthur are on a holiday. A moment of silence probably would have been more appropriate. In Gilliam’s dark time bandits, a young boy shouts “Mum? Dad?” to the obliterated house of his parents and it captures the moment perfectly.
They need to look for a space gun that…oh, why do we have to? Like the book, the protagonist starts losing interest to the point they get sidetracked with all the incredible things the universe has to offer. As President of the Universe, Sam Rockwell comically takes on the role of an egocentric country singer blended with George Bush. In one scene, he humorously dashes around the spaceship while two people inside him are bickering over spatial navigation, and yes, there’s the classic penis joke as well.
The absurdities of Hitchhiker’s Guide are furthered by some arbitrarily included comedies that give no significant value to the story’s development. Director Garth Jennings lacks the skills to create any tension or pursue useful themes. This ‘Arthur Dent’ character does nothing save being bored out of his mind. To me, that is an issue that book adaptations suffer from – call me Ishmael, etc. The love story involving Arthur and a self-centered Earth girl played by Zooey Deschanel is ineffective because they are never more than two-dimensional comedy caricatures: the nerd and the unattainable dame. Adams permits his nerdy fanboys some space to project onto Arthur Dent like they did onto the characters in their rejections during high school. But on the screen, Freeman and Deschanel provide such exaggeratedly theatrical and strained performances that boys to men seem like works of art. To put it plainly, they are bad, but they just happen to be a little less bad than everyone else. Meanwhile, Rockwell’s over-the-top acting is obnoxious. Undoubtedly, one knows it’s a wild trip when the person speaking the least is John Malkovich.
Hitchhikers Guide is far more than a bad book adaptation, its also an incredibly annoying one due to the overconfidence we see. If you are not a geek who is able to keep up with the rapid fire pace, then you have indeedbrought your self to the wrong film. Each and every drive or character leads to an unsolved climax, sanwiching it in between borders of the movie itself. Grab a glass of water and relax because there is zero suspense to be had in this one. Once you start comprehending that the ADHD induced pace of Hitchhikers Guide is all thanks to Adams, you are met the sheer realization that there are no story problems present, which in turn makes you toss and turn within your seat. If anything and everything can happen, then why waste your time caring? sedate yourself because we are opening a deep thoughts pandora box. Is this the image Adams aimed for? And if so, let me put it like this, I am soberingly depressed – Marvin the Paranoid Robot.
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