Distorted (2018)

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John Ma and Boomer, voiced by Jackie Chan, are twins who were separated at birth and neither one of them has ever met the other. John Ma is a qualified pianist with a name that has resounded in every corner of the globe while Boomer is a mechanic and martial artist living in Hong Kong. When Boomers friend Tyson and himself set out to save a new performer at the club named Barbara, they get caught in a mix of situations which even Jackie Chan himself would have trouble with. To get out alive, they make a bet on a race, intending to win but eventually losing, and then looking for a way out through mainland China. During this ordeal, Boomer gets to meet John Ma but Tyson gets abducted. As the two begin to solve the most pressing issue, which is Boomers abduction, things become more complicated as forceful meetings arise between the brothers who share the same face.

When it comes to Jackie Chan, I’m an aficionado. He has always impressed me with his breathtaking stunts and rapid punches and kicks from the time I saw First Strike on cassette. However, the majority of his films lack depth and have been riddled with corniness. Some of the coolest stunts were part of Operation Condor, but the supporting cast was terrible! With Mr. Nice Guy, there were a few cool stunts but the movie is pretty bad. So don’t rent it unless you want to berate it. The acting was non-existent which just made the corniness worse. So maybe that’s why I enjoyed last year’s Rush Hour. It was Chan’s first highly publicized, American produced film and it was excellent! Too bad he wasn’t hired earlier in America.

So here is 1992 Twin Dragons, a Japanese production starring Chan, the newest addition to the U.S. The action is identical, but the fun is indeed present. Yeah, the plot was boring too. However, even though the over-dubbing was pretty lame, the film is extremely entertaining. Chan’s voice was speaking American. The fun is at maximum with Chan during the moments when the twins are mistaken for each other.

The only downside is that John Ma is a coward. Whereas John Ma retreats like a “Jackie Chan,” Boomer fights like one. The funny exaggerations were split between these two Chan actors. But what truly sets this film apart is not the acting that leaves a lot to be desired, from moments of blunt cheesiness, impotent gags, bad over-dubbing, and accent instead, it is the finale to the film.

Boomer battles against gangsters at a car testing site during the last fight sequence. Chan not only fights, but also flees from a speeding vehicle toward him, bout in a car wash, and even brawl inside a hot testing chamber.

The dialogue was, in fact, the worst I’ve encountered in any dubbed movies. A lot of S words, S.O.B.s, and more in between. The sexually related comments and innuendos were the highest in a Japanese film like this that I have seen too. Most of it was unnecessary but not extremely bad, however. The intention was to depict comic relief. As for the most part, nudity related materials are restricted to a statue and a slight side view of Tammy’s chest. Major things are not in there. Boomer mistakenly thinks that Tammy wants to have sex and goes for it. He takes off his shirt and jumps in bed with her. Nothing is shown, but it is assumed that they have sex. This scene is the basis for several jokes, too.

All in all, the movie was okay. The corny plot and story-line along with the over-dubs are the reasons as to why this is not a great movie, but Chan’s stunning presence and superb stunt work make the picture, and in essence, save it. I couldn’t support jabbing the score higher than 2.5 for the aforementioned reasons jarred me. Jackie Chan fans: if you are fond of him, this wouldn’t disappoint you. And for people who do not know much of Chan’s works, I would not recommend it because the content in Rush Hour makes it hard to credibly suggest. If you have queries about the film prior to watching it, I’d be happy to help. – John DiBiase

There is a small amount of short sexual related conversations exchanged. Tammy is seen very breifly climbing into a tub exposing the side of her chest. In this scene where Tammy is in bed with Boomer after mistaking him for John Ma, she tells him how she wishes that he would massage her like how John did. As soon as he hears that, he assumed it was an invitation for sex, so he jumped on the bed once she took off her shirt and slid out of her pants. This is how piggish Boomer refers to she is when they are in bed and he calls it a workout.

Blood/Gore: In a retro black and white flashback, a gangster has a few drops of blood on him. As he shoots at a few people, blood sprays from his victims. The mob boss wears a few bandages which are stained with blood. John Ma and Boomer sit quietly in a corner with a small flow of blood coming from their noses.

Violence: There is a lot of shooting, kicking, punching, crashing cars, blowing things up, hitting people with various objects, and so on.

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