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While the world may appear like it is healing post pandemic, it is still evident that something is amiss. The balance of nature has yet to restore itself. Evidence of this can be found in the form of the latest low-effort mockbusters by Asylum Studio titled Aquarium of the Dead. Asylum Studios have shamelessly exploited the industry since the 1990s and have produced a plethora of unsuccessful films (such as Ape vs Monster where the title speaks for itself) because of how low the standards are. Aquarium of the Dead is quite terrible, but not in the way one would expect. For one, this movie does not make you want to take your own life the instant the credits start rolling due to how embarrassing it is to sit through. Instead, it is reasonable to say that the film is decent enough.
Aquarium of the Dead was directed by Glenn Miller and written by Marc Gottlieb, tells the story of a strange southern California aquarium. Two of its employees are trying to save an octopus, but don’t fret, it gets weirder. The employees are trying to save the octopus by injecting it with epinephrine, but what they are really using is a contaminated substance. This previously used method saves the creature but also turns it into a vicious, bloodthirsty killer. It manages to escape and spreads its bacteria to the stars and animal inhabitants of the aquarium. The ACK to the aquarium system is all futuristic planted, so to say. Along with poorly made computer graphics. The movie is scatterbrained nonsense but interesting in a peculiar manner that makes viewers hold on till the end.
The film is neither mediocre nor poorly executed with its budget constraints, as the acting, no matter how exaggerated, shows competency. The directing manages to pull the film together, elevating it beyond the expectations of a warehouse production. One noteworthy performance is from Madeline Falk, who, as Dr. Karen James, gives a hilariously bad performance that is beyond over-the-top. At the same time, Gottlieb’s screenplay takes a different approach and doesn’t let itself take the film seriously. There is some clever banter with the boring Sharknado franchise, a few good exchanges between the characters, and a spectacular line where one hero screams, I ain’t dying today!” before, you guessed it, dying. The effects are still budget constrained, but are acceptable. The starfish attack sequence, while being more of a static performer, captures the attention. However, it is nowhere near as terrifying, as suggested by the mindless on-screen screaming and chaos.
In the end, we already know where we stand with an Asylum movie. It’s junk food for the mind, but unlike Aquarium of the Dead, it is at least well-cooked and presented in a nice bun that is unlikely to make you throw up once you’ve digested it all. There is no chance you will be asking for a second helping of it, but we’re willing to bet you will order something off Asylum’s menu sooner or later. Moving on to Ape vs Monster.
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