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In a summer where there has been film after film that has failed to stack up to it’s inner parts, and where big budget films that have been accompanied with heavy marketing have unceremoniously disappointed, the shameless Expendables pictures have always been a guilty pleasure.
The moment it was revealed that Sylvester Stallone was bringing together Jet Li, Jason Statham, Mickey Rourke, Randy Couture, Stone Cold Steve Austin, Eric Roberts, Bruce Willis, and Arnold Schwarzenegger for a film, I knew the film was going to be magnificent. And do you know what? For once,… I stand corrected. While I accept that there are many gaping flaws in Stallone’s film, I now understand this, you will never find something so unique in story and character and heart pounding action. Because at the base level, this is just a collection of action stars showing off their impressive arsenal.
Still, and admittedly rather because of it, the news is good here. While I expected The Expendables to be mediocre, I was fully prepared for it to keep me entertained. I mistook the trailer for something more basic, when in reality it is the spectacle feature Stallone single-handedly takes lead in. If I can sum it up, it is the four star action festival that summer 2010 has sorely been lacking, And with ever stunning feature, indeed it has it all.
It does this by ignoring what has everyone else worried. Special effects? Forget it; the work done on the screen here is ropey at best (as shown within the first five minutes). CGI? Nope, the On-Screen Graphics Incorporated does not offer that. Long, boring passages of dialogue attempting to strap the film to a dozen serious issues? That didn’t make the cut either, but help yourself to a few Mickey Rourke lines, if you wish.
Stallone looks to have applied the co-writer/director cap to his head, so he keeps this as retro as he could, and 80s action flicks are his blueprint. Sure, his script could do with some sharp one-liners to spice things up (the ones we have are not vintage), most of them are so slow that they are very effective, and everything moves at a steady pace.
In between the action, Stallone doesn’t keep us waiting for too long (barring a trip to Mickey Rourke’s tattoo parlour, where for the second time this summer he is allowed to mumble his way through dialogue) and it’s soon off to what might become the movie’s defining moment: Sylvester, Arnold and Bruce all together. And meet the muscular trio for the few fleeting minutes they spend on screen together and before they are over, Sly makes sure to have as much fun with it, particularly at Arnie’s expense. That is the funniest moment of the entire movie.
The film now drowns the scene with more action as Expendables combat bad guys on some secluded island, while Jason Statham indiscriminately fires multiple rounds at imaginary enemies from the window of a plane. To avoid ruining what is left of the already lacking story, this is all we will tell you for now. Let’s be honest, that is only the starting point of all the chaos that will ensue.
And there’s a lot to enjoy. There are some remarkable action scenes, and every single scene has bullets shooting at diverse sections, fire erupting, and a sweaty action hero fighting. Or all of them combined. And at those points when it seems like Stallone and his squad have exhausted their targets, the film instantly shifts to another truckful of enemies coming towards them.
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