30,000 Leagues Under The Sea (2007)

30,000-Leagues-Under-The-Sea-(2007)
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This 2007 offering from low-budget exploitation champions, The Asylum, seeks to recreate the famed Verne novel, but as expected, falls face flat on reality. For one, there are no retellings, so any expectations in that spectrum are completely misplaced. Also, adding an extra 10,000 leagues to the title provides them an easy escape from the fact that the novel is far from detailed. Now that emotions are set, this is also the height of creative efforts.

As if that wasn’t enough, there is also Nemo, with his morbid antics and the advanced submarine Nautilus. Let’s not forget the portion where, without a doubt, at least 30,000 leagues are traveled. But hey, look at that, a mechanized version of a squid shows up. But not just any squid, this is created specifically for Nima to attack Navy vessels for him (see the DVD cover). I stand by my take that 30,000 Leagues Under The Sea is nothing but an exploitative copy of 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea, and it is not an attempt to do justice to the original novel.

It helps that there is Lorenzo Lamas who rather steadfastly endures it with great fortitude and professional aplomb. Considering the flaws of budget-independent genre films, this one doesn’t really have too many redeeming features. Sean Lawlor’s interpretation of the madman Captain Nemo is rather effective in other scenes, although sometimes he is so ineptly filmed interacting verbally with Lamas’ Lieutenant Aronnaux that it appears neither of them even knows the other exists or is following the flow of the conversation. The same goes for Natalie Stone, or rather Lieutenant Commander Rollins, who looks as convincing as attractive young actresses always do in those sorts of movies, but Rod Serling’s budget affords them amply. In fact, judging the real effectiveness of all these constitute is rather problematic, since the script, as it is realized on screen anyway, does cut out any decent possibility of performance more than once.

This production has its problems, major problems, and while there is a lot of gossip online concerning the identity of the main players, I lack any credible source sufficinet enough to shed light on the matter. As such, I will refrain from discussing it. It seems that many of the scenes were not actually shot, and the editor was left to piece them together in post-production. But how could he have really achieved anything of true editorial consummation? His connection to the film was like that of speed dating where there is hardly any depth or commitment. Dialogue scenes are ineptly clumsy; the pacing is off logic is missing, the action is surprisingly unchanging, and the film’s narrative arc is a total disaster.

And on top of that, the dialogue is the unmixed product of utter confusion. It was captured from an extreme distance and through a microphone stolen from some junior DJ’s karaoke set. It is clear that this film did not do magic for me, and I am sure for many it offered no enchantment on any level.

I may be convinced into agreeing that the CGI subs, mecha-squid, and references to Atlantis were fine in a more forgiving perspective, but it is worth noting that they seemed to be present only in bits and pieces, which were repeated ad nauseam, but instead of being actually utilized were shifted around, edited and doused in a rainbow of color for maximum effect.

However, that is all there is. This is a movie that had so much more that it could have done, well, let us say more of what it already contains would not be a good thing. As it now stands the only good reason to ever release it was so that the powers that be could claim they have met their contractual obligations and wash their hands off a financially disastrous venture without actually spending any more money.

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